Anxiety and Easter weekend

Well, as you know I still haven't called to make my "appointment", though today may be the day.

It was Easter this past weekend. I went to my sisters house, her 7 kids were all home, and my mom was over, and although I still find myself in about an AMPED-8 on the 1-10 scale, my brother asked me to go with him which made it do-able. Far from acceptable as I used to be able to spend hours on end with my neices, but a small victory.

I didnt see my own son or my grandson, and to be honest they didn't ask. Much like most of my life I'm sure he's tired of excuses.

Also saw a show on TV this morning about a guy with Bi-polar and an addiction problem he gained by self medication which eventually cost him a major sports career. He is clean now for 3 years, and one of his points was that he learned his brain was 'wired wrong' and that now with his brain working properly he is able to mount a comeback, in a different sport since he was banned for life in the major league, but he is succesful in his field. I would like success too, in any field.

So today, I hope to make that call....