Physical anxiety symptoms vs Mental Anxiety Symptoms

So as you've read, I am on some meds finally and though I consider myself in the adjustment period, one of the drugs, XANAX, is pretty quick acting.
I am also taking Lexapro and am on my 6th day of 10mg. I am taking .5mg Xanax 3x a day over the adjustment period.

First off, I just want to say that I was very VERY surprised to be prescribed the alprazolam (xanax).. but as I am following my Drs orders I do NOT feel overly medicated and I do feel WAY less anxious and have not really spiked a panic attack. I would say that this is because I'm still staying within my safety zones, being a good little agoraphobic, but today I did actually go to the bank, and to the service station to get air in my tire. This act caused me great distress last week.

Today was kind of strange. Waiting in line at the bank, my mind knew I needed to be wound up about this. Also pulling in to the service station to get air reminded me of how this made me feel just last week. Here is the thing... without my body fulfilling the anxious desires of my mind I was unable to be afraid of these things as I have been in the past. Was I unsure.. Oh yes, of course I was. This has only been one week and I've suffered with Panic and Anxiety for over 13 years.
I was affected profoundly by the fact that even though my mind wanted to be anxious I was unable to blow it out of proportion without the accompanying physical sensations.

I have read this over and over again in every book and course I've read on these diseases. Don't be fooled by the physical sensations. They are tricking you and cannot hurt you. Man, if I could have just done that, but I fell for it every single time.

So that's where I am today. I plan to continue to travel old paths that used to cause me such distress. Hopefully my mind can break the habits that it's been practicing all this time.

Again I want to say to you if you're reading this blog and felt the things I've felt. You're NOT handling it. There is help available, even if you don't have money or insurance. Start asking. Its the first step that took me 13 yrs.